I wonder how cold it has to be for time to stop completely...

.


It's hot.
It's hot.
It's hot.
So, it's so hot.
It's hot in this room. Keeps me awake.
Or maybe I just keep thinking the heat keeps me awake...maybe there's something more?
I need to unwind. Does it ever seem that more goes on when you're doing nothing than when you're on a roll? Perhaps I just have too much time to think these days.
You want to know what I'm thinking about right now?
I'm thinking about that last string of words, I guess.
Too much time, eh? Too much...yeah, but when is anything ever enough? It's always too much or too little. I think the concept of human satisfaction at times is tantamount to the concept of love itself. You never know...you never know if this it good enough, if this is really so bad...
Is this really so bad? Nah.
I guess what I'm trying to say is...well...is this:
Sometimes I feel more alone when I'm surrounded by those who truely care for me.
Sometimes a smile will puddle me up and leave me seeping through cracks in the floor.
Sometimes I just want to tear the world apart.
Break it down. Break it all to pieces, slip them in my pocket...put them together tomorrow on a picnic table in the park. Put them together, a mosaic that I can see clearly, that I can run my fingers across without getting a single sliver, measurable and melting at a pace I can understand.
Sometimes I can't believe how strange it is to be anything at all.